Today I made the hardest decision I have ever made. I had to decide whether to put my dog down.

Peanut was diagnosed with pulmonary cancer three months and 4 days ago. We have fought his cancer, and I never compromised anything in his treatment. It was a true test of discipline to balance law school with caring for a dying pet. Anyone who has never had a pet will not be able to relate, and I pity the person who does not know the unconditional love of an animal.

I was blessed to have Peanut in my life. I have no regrets about his death, just that I will miss him…

If you can’t find it easily on Lexis or Westlaw, is it that important?

Seriously? 140 pages? Is hott attorney coming back to teach the class? *sigh (And don’t forget the 20 from the supplement.)

When I was a little(r) kid, I used to think every day was a sitcom with a theme (example: “All Things Slimy”) now I think every day is a tragedy.

The panic is starting to set in since it is two months to finals. (What the $#@&!! is hearsay???)

The raw cookiedough isn’t seeming like a good idea right now.

(or what I will do to put off reading about $%#@! hearsay)

Please tell the bacon to stop calling me.

Take away Peanut’s cancer.

Yahoo, get a clue. I said 35-45, and did I mention the hottness?

*whining: Why can’t I have nightmares about a beaver and Abraham Lincoln.

Send me a study partner.

Hell, send me a friend.

Make the voices stop. Forever.

Define hearsay.

Better yet, define the Commerce Clause.

Please keep my dog from going for the jugular while I am sleeping. (See photo.)

I have not been writing because I am dealing with the news that my dog has pulmonary cancer, and the tumor is so large that the vet is unable to help us.

Believe it or not, I am talking about my 8 year old Chihuahua- not my poodle who is much older. I have had Peanut as a puppy since I was a first year teacher. The spring after I got him, he saved my life by waking me up when a man broke into my home while I was sleeping.

I feel like I am being ripped apart because I always thought he would be with me- at least until I graduated from law school or got married. He has definitely raised my quality of life- I would stay at the school studying 24/7, but I come home to take care of him.

Peanut is always happy to see me, and I swear I think he is psychic. He always knows when I am upset and will crawl into my lap.

When I first got him, I was living with my parents. My mother convinced my father to allow me to get him. My father wanted me to find a house first- then get a Chihuahua. She cried and I cried, and he caved. I got Peanut that day. The woman I bought him from said no one wanted him because he was so small. She told him that she knew someone would come for him- there was someone out there for him. Which amazingly, was the same thing my mother said to me- there was a dog out there for me. We found each other. He is the best $250 I have ever spent, and he is worth more to me than anything I own.

Anywho, I lived with my parents and traveled for an hour to school everyday, and as a new teacher I had to work late. When I would come home, I would shout, “Helloooooo!” and Peanut would answer me with a “hellooooo!” No matter how tired I am, or what kind of mood I am in, he always lifts my spirits.

When I finally bought my house a month later, I remember being so scatterbrained trying to organize and unpack. I was terrified because I felt like the mortgage was a big scary monster, and a huge commitment, and I am terrified of commitment. The only way I could get my puppy to eat, was for me to eat, which I did standing in the kitchen in front of a big window. I remember looking down at him and thinking, “What the hell have we gotten ourselves into?” Peanut just looked back up at me with those huge brown eyes and ears cocked, listening and trusting me.

Peanut listens to everything, and I am afraid to talk about his cancer in front of him because I don’t want him to lose hope.

The vet prescribed piroxicam, and my father ordered an herbal supplement which is supposed to work wonders with “cancer dogs.” I am having a hard time accepting that I own a “cancer dog,” but I saw the x-rays and the tumor is huge. I will continue to give Peanut TLC and plenty of high protein foods. If you know anything about this medication, or you have some advice- please, please post a comment.

2) Subtract five miles per hour from the posted speed limit for every stuffed animal in the back of a car to determine its relative speed.

3) Never come between a cop and his donut.

4) Armadillos have replaced the turtle as the slowest land animal- er, one of them anyway. (See above)

5) A dove can coo 9432 times during a 350 mile drive.

6) South of the Border has 13 signs between the southern border of SC and Florence.

7) NC must have the same landscaping company as SC.

8) GA’s highways are only under construction so they can charge double speeding fines.

11) Paul Newman as the figurehead for Caesar salad dressing.

10) Ricky Watters (since 1994)

9) Robert Shaw- Quint from Jaws (damn, he died when I was 3- oh well, stays on the list)

8) James Belushi (from “The Principal”)

7) Vince Young (if he was older or I was younger)

6) Jack Nicholson (preferably “One Flew Over the Cuckcoo’s Nest” since I like the bad boys)

5) James Caan

4) Robert DeNiro- any age

3) Russell Crowe (in that Gladiator outfit- HOTT)

2) Gerard Butler (300, Phantom, Timeline, Reign of Fire) (MEOW)

1) ?????????

Swam 1/2 mile.

Cleaned my apartment.

Cleaned Haiku’s cage.

Shaved Willie.

 Unless you have taken ANY kind of law school essay, you won’t be able to relate.

I sat around for about two hours after the Labor Law exam wondering what the hell happened to me (then I had to study for Sports Law). 3 HOURS GOES BY QUICK when you have a gazillion issues on which to write. I thought my fingers were bleeding at one point from typing, but I didn’t have time to look down.

This was also the first exam I have been in where only one person finished before the time was up. And I swear I heard her say, “Fuck it, I’ll take a C.”

Me, however. I couldn’t yank the starters off the field. No special teams, no punting. If we could, we tried to run the score up on the essay. I might have been on point; I don’t know. (Then my computer wouldn’t upload the essay. I almost started crying. I thought I would have to retype it. As I found out I typed 15 pages.)

I woke up this morning at 4:37 am in a cold sweat wondering, “Did I GD mention the rockthrowing in my essay?”

Yes, there was rock throwing. There were all kinds of things going on. GD scabs, crossing the picket line. LOL